Unplugging

There are just days where I simply want to unplug from everything, turn off my cellphone service, disconnect my laptop from the wifi hotspot, and go outside. I know shocker, Isabel a hermit crab in her own house going outside for a little R & R with nature. Can she handle it? Of course. And it's probably a good way to reset your system (the more alone you are without the distraction of others, the better in my opinion) It's not because I'm upset at the world that I feel like disconnecting but sometimes it is too overwhelming for me to handle that I need to step back from all this advancement, hit pause, and breathe. I begin to stress over things that are not even pertaining to me and I don't need any unneeded stress and you shouldn't either. There are days I reminisce when the only things I had to worry about was that I if I'm wearing my clothes correctly, being on time to watch Drake & Josh, and to find a friend on my street that will come play Polly Pockets with me in the open garage. Technology is becoming an addiction to us and I'm concerned as to what will come next. It's like I'm running but I'm not able to catch up because the finish line is always extending itself. There are days where I ask myself why do I own a phone if all it does is live in my pocket silently. If there was other ways of contacting my mother without my cellphone, I'd probably not own a phone in the first place because that was my main concern. I wish there was more parks around where I live maybe then will people come out to enjoy the sun and the swings. I sense this is more of a thought than a an advice today but don't forget that there is more to what is on a glass screen. If needed take a friend with you and go on a mini adventure. Create new memories without the need of technology, think of them as little secrets for your own keepsakes. 

Anything you miss before technology took over?

xx Chavelita

Why are you so confident?

Yes I was on Ask.Fm again, and yes there is still some disrespectful people on there but that is the wrong blogpost, as I was getting ready for bed someone sends me this question, "Why are you so pretty and confident!!" Although there is no question mark found in that sentence I couldn't stop blushing. I was a bit starstruck you can say to an anonymous. And I replied,

"I'm pretty because of my genes (don't ask what in my weird mind made me say that) and I'm guessing my personality aha and I'm confident because I'm tired of people taking others for granted and not speaking up for themselves (that used to be me). So I try to present the image of a confident lady so I inspire others to be confident in themselves. Embrace yourself, flaunt your flaws and someone will come along and love you for who you are. It's all in my blog honestly. And thank you. :)"

I wanted to elaborate more on that response because confidence is something that we all struggle to gain. Some days our confidence level is at the brim ready to spill out and other days we barely have any confidence to even leave the house. Confidence is hard. I am not going to lie or sugarcoat. There are days that I stare myself in the mirror and wonder what people see in me or notice in just that short glimpse. Not much other than my physical features such as I am a short female with dark brown eyes and dark brown hair. I feel people at first impression only see maybe ten percent of the person you are. The rest of the ninety percent is all formulated through experiences, stories, and memories. So it wouldn't be fair to compare your whole one hundred percent on someone else's ten percent. You are not giving yourself a chance nor are you giving the other person a chance. I know looks can be deceiving, people's behavior can be confusing, and meeting people for the first time can be a bit of a plot twist. Though we are not all perfect, even those who may be bubbly most of the time face similar issues so please do not compare yourself or create assumptions that they have it better. With confidence comes power and without confidence comes with insecurities. In my opinion, I would rather have a little bit of power than a whole load of insecurities. Insecurities are like the Thursday's in my life in a school week, it would feel like a Friday but you still have another day to go until the weekend. You have to learn to live with your insecurities, become best friends to the point where you know them inside and out that allows you to gain your own voice. Then maybe the ten percent that you are allowing people to see will become an eleven percent or higher.

The way I gain confidence is learning from my previous mistakes and how uncomfortable and frustrating they caused me at the time. I remember going to church one day with my family and we went to a different mass than the one we normally go to and my luck I was sitting next to someone I did not know. I would of not mind other than the fact that the man would not give me my personal space. I kindly pushed him away but he kept pushing back. My mom noticed how uncomfortable I was so she switched seats with me and told the man what he was doing. I wish I had spoken up that day...

One of the largest pet peeves is when people instead of asking me to help them on homework (which I would try my best in doing) ask me for the answers. I am no homework bank where I can reproduce you the work at any given moment for no cost. It's probably the only time where I am noticed from others around my age group and it aggravates me. Though do not do what I did and question, "why am I so different from everyone else? why don't I fit in?". You do fit in somewhere, maybe not with the group you think you did but somewhere else and I will tell you when you find your group you will feel so much better. Your self image will bloom and you will laugh at those people searching for other sources of gaining their work. Do not lower your standards to people who will not live up to them, change because of your own benefit.

What is something that annoys you about people?



xx Chavelita

Bumblebee

I thought you should meet another person I am grateful to have in my life. For privacy, the person I am going to speak about we will call her Bee.

It is almost a year since I met Bee and she has created such a large impact in my life she is probably the one who helped boost my self esteem and molded me into the confident being that I am. Turning my flaws into beautiful imperfections, that makes me stand out from the rest of the world. Normally when I meet people who I am on a professional platform, I do not like to go personal. I was told by a teacher in my sophomore year of high school that, "we are not friends" to our class and that because she had given us her number to call if we had any questions on the homework it does not mean we could text her. That mentality stuck with me, oddly it did make sense at the moment because students and teachers were separate things at the time but it all changed my junior year. I will not lie I was confused, we could not text teachers but joining the IB program they give you their numbers to text them if anything (unless otherwise told that you can't) and I was I actually afraid to text my teachers since I thought it was pretty unorthodox to do. It was not until my friend persuaded me to text her and by the things she told me, perhaps it was okay to do so. It all started with a simple text message and from there our friendship flourished. She started to lean on me and I did the same in return. Her background stories are moving you would not expect stories like that coming from a bubbly person like herself. Though she does apologize a lot for little things which I think may not deserve an apology. I could say she is part of my family she is tied between the big sister or an aunt to me including her beautiful children. I can tell her anything and it would be casual which is one of the things I love about her. The little moments when I do have her for myself I find myself laughing and listening to her stories since I do not talk much, I believe there is hardly ever an awkward moment with her. Anytime spent with her makes me happy.

One of my favorite memories I had with her is when she took me to one of her presentations and when she took me back home. We spoke at my drive way for an hour or so in her car. I was surprise to say that my parents did not realize that I was out til 9 on a school night even less in the drive way so technically I was at home just not in it. It is probably one of the simplistic memories I share with her but I just love how quiet the night was. No distractions and it was just us two spending time together sharing our own memories. It was also the day I gave her a rosary in her favorite color and the moment she opened her gift, it was like Christmas morning. Her face was glowing and astonished that she even gave me a hug (we had never hugged until that day, I'm usually the hugging type of person but I somehow grew uncomfortable to hugs).

Bee is one of my inspirational role models, against the odds she still finds a way to tackle on the day with her work, caring for her children, all on her own. With her charismatic attitude, beautiful smile, and her perky lipstick this lady is going places! I'm honestly having a difficult time writing this blogpost since I cannot fathom the words to describe how wonderful she is. You have to meet her for yourself to understand the emotions I am going through. I love you, Bee! Continue being the person you are, accomplish your set dreams and I am sure the right one will come along and sweep you off your feet!

This is why I am telling you that you should give everyone a chance, you will never know who you will meet and have your life changed.



xx Chavelita

Sink or swim?

Today's dream inspired me to talk about support systems such as family, friends, animals, etc. 

Last night I dreamt about being in a house that most of my family (my extended family) was lounging around in the dark chatting around and the only source of light came from the light posts from outside. We decided to take a walk and I was walking alongside my Mom when a deer approached us from the behind. The deer slowly came walking towards and suddenly came charging at me who was almost about to strike me across the forehead with his legs. And whenever you're about to get hit you embrace yourself before you actually get hurt so you somehow close your eyes and wait for the strike? Well I was expecting it but my Mom blocked the hit for me, scared off the deer, and took me to the hospital (in which in the dream I had no knowledge that I went to the hospital but I was told in my dream that I went). The rest of the dream we lounged around the couch. The end. 

When you're feeling lonely, in need of someone to talk to, or need help, support systems seem to do the trick. The thing about a support system is that it can be made through your own adjustments so it doesn't always have to follow the typical family and friends. I have also learned that speaking to your pet can also be as helpful as speaking to a person. Creative methods such as writing, singing, art, etc. can also provide a support system in which you may have trouble expressing your emotions verbally (or maybe you don't want to talk about them) with someone though these alternatives can be just as effective. The goal of this support system is to not keep things bottled in. When you need to vent/rant/talk you should do so, throw out the toxic emotions, and relieve yourself. Holding in tears, telling lies to cover up true emotions, smiling without the sensation of happiness are not productive coping techniques. They become bad habits that can really take a toll in your physical and mental health. You should never pretend to feel fine when you are not, if it takes a day to explain your situation so be it. Sometimes when people say it is a long story half of the time or maybe a quarter they are not even long. Once when you break out of your outer shell, the world seems to be a brighter and clearer place that you may have overlooked throughout the time you've been masking and hiding within that self-produced shell. 

Think of life as this metaphor, when you're at a beach before you get into the water you touch the surface, feel for yourself of how cold or hot the water may be and you watch the waves come back and forth. Your feet begin to sink into the sand. You begin to go in and the water is at your knees adjusting your body to the temperature of the water, but you're still on the surface. A little deeper and your head is the only thing above the surface. Now it's your decision, go in deeper and experience what is out there risking the fact that you may drown or you may swim or go back to the sand, watch the waves, and not know what you could of accomplished if you took that leap? Food for thought. 

I hope you're having a great day and I'll leave you with this question: What do you think the metaphor symbolizes? 

xx Chavelita