What are you excited about?
xx Chavelita
Showing posts with label doubt. Show all posts
Showing posts with label doubt. Show all posts
Monday, July 13, 2015
Day 13: "I'm so excited and I just can't hide it!"
There is only two things I feel like I'm excited about at the moment. One of them would be to see and hug my dad again for the first time in nine months and the second would be starting college. The only downside is that these two events almost happen around the same time, so I find it quite upsetting that I am not able to spend as much time with my dad after waiting for this eternity to end and for this moment to happen. On the other hand though, I'm actually pumped to start college which is another part of growing up and developing my character that would potentially tackle the world with the rest of the people who are attacking this world. I won't lie though, I am scared for this moment to happen because I know I would want to tap out within the very month or two that I was dropped off in college. Only do the people who went out of town for college can understand the same mixed emotions I am sensing because I will not be able to simply take a public bus home and sleep in my own bed with my parents asking me how my day went. Though as I have told plenty of people, if I do not leave now then I feel like I would never leave the comfort of my house. I am the one here detaching myself from my bubble, this comfort zone that I had created for myself the start of my freshman year of high school and well beginning from scratch to build a new comfort zone in college with my new not yet met peers and professors. The only thing that has kept my sanity together is the faith I have placed on myself that not everything will go as planned but at least I am giving this a try and I'm really running with the wind. College to me sounds like such a great opportunity, I have heard stories from my parents and I actually want stories of my own to share at the dinner table whenever I reunite with my loved ones. I know that this semester of college will probably not be the smoothest of semesters but I will not be the only freshman in college to be feeling those pangs of nostalgia, fear, and doubt. I just have to remain calm, smile and say hello to anyone I encounter, and try my best to transition myself into college mode.
What are you excited about?
xx Chavelita
What are you excited about?
xx Chavelita
Saturday, April 18, 2015
Wings should be spread, not tucked
"Where will you be going to college?"
"What will you be majoring in?"
"Are you going to miss anyone when you leave for college?"
"How do you feel?"
In a nutshell, college has been the corn of the crop in many of my conversations I have encountered with other people which to me I do not mind since I already have a set plan but it does give me a reality check of what I will be leaving behind and what there is to expect as I spread these wings of mine. I have come to notice that the comfortable life at home will no longer be filled with my mother's cooking after a long day of school or of my father's jokes when he gets home from work or not being able to see my brothers or to split paths with my best friend, this is going to be difficult for me. I know, I know that this transition will be hard but there is one thing that I am absolutely certain of is that if I do not leave for college now in this following autumn, and actually leave my house, pack up my things and leave this comfortable bubble town I will not have the urge to leave after. I am afraid of leaving do not get me wrong, but as scared as I am, I want to be able to experience this life everyone complains about. To have the chance to inhale this new breath of life first handed without having someone telling me where to go or what to do. To commit my own mistakes and find solutions for them. The sensation to feel human and carry out my own name instead being known as the little sister.
Another thing I want to touch upon is relationships not that I am in any at the moment, but I want to let you know that going to college is your moment and no one else's. As much as I wanted to bluntly tell people you should not go to the same college as your boyfriend/girlfriend unless that is truly the first choice of your college. Do not call me a pessimist but relationships change from high school going into college. Emotions will happen that you had no idea that could be felt, the change in environment could also be a factor, and as philosophical as this is going to sound when you are in college you have a tendency to find yourself. College is probably one of the most important locations that people find out more about themselves than anywhere else because you finally have to do things that are in your benefit not in other peoples benefits. So what worked in high school may not always transfer over into your college life and before anyone begins to freak out, this is totally fine. If something does not fit in your life you are allowed to make the necessary changes to create a balance within your life.
Though on the other hand if you do maintain your long distance relationship with your high school sweetheart the one thing I would not do is suffocate them. Even being far away, entrapment can happen. Instead give them their space, message them frequently and pick a day or two out of the week to actually call or video chat with them. When I say talk to them I actually mean putting everything down, sitting down and giving your undivided attention. If you want to you can call them more to ask how they are doing but actually take a day out of your week to catch up with your partner, no one likes to be out of the loop! To listen to a familiar voice could ease the stress and could even encourage the relationship to continue. Remind each other that despite the miles of distance, the situations that will happen in life because life just loves to make any moment spontaneous when it can, that you are there for them to listen and regardless of what happens that you love them. (In my personal opinion even sending written letters are a lovely reminder. There is just something in seeing someone's handwriting in a letter that gives the effect that they are with you.) Conclusions could be drawn, but if you remind them of how much they mean to you the less they will worry you and the less you will worry. Physical touch is limited in a long distance relationship which may be the leading cause of why these relationships complicate themselves but it truly takes some strong partners who are loyal, honest, patient, and hopeful to make the relationship work. For any reason that you feel like you are doubting this relationship or your partner is drifting then that means there is some sort of lack of communication which should be fixed immediately. If you are upset just know that solving problems miles away will get difficult as each day passes so please take care of any issues, and if you have to swallow your pride, and apologize in the appropriate time frames.
College gives me mixed emotions and hopefully I am not the only one aha but just know that do not force anything if there are things that are supposed to happen they will or they may have already happened. Please do not doubt yourself this should be the time where we plunge into the deep end and experience many of the things we imagine to do when we were in high school or even when we were little kids. Stay hopeful, keep those minds open, and remember that there will always be someone out there to help you wherever you go! (Who may also be your next best friend!)
What is something that you look forward to in college?
xx Chaveltia
"What will you be majoring in?"
"Are you going to miss anyone when you leave for college?"
"How do you feel?"
In a nutshell, college has been the corn of the crop in many of my conversations I have encountered with other people which to me I do not mind since I already have a set plan but it does give me a reality check of what I will be leaving behind and what there is to expect as I spread these wings of mine. I have come to notice that the comfortable life at home will no longer be filled with my mother's cooking after a long day of school or of my father's jokes when he gets home from work or not being able to see my brothers or to split paths with my best friend, this is going to be difficult for me. I know, I know that this transition will be hard but there is one thing that I am absolutely certain of is that if I do not leave for college now in this following autumn, and actually leave my house, pack up my things and leave this comfortable bubble town I will not have the urge to leave after. I am afraid of leaving do not get me wrong, but as scared as I am, I want to be able to experience this life everyone complains about. To have the chance to inhale this new breath of life first handed without having someone telling me where to go or what to do. To commit my own mistakes and find solutions for them. The sensation to feel human and carry out my own name instead being known as the little sister.
Another thing I want to touch upon is relationships not that I am in any at the moment, but I want to let you know that going to college is your moment and no one else's. As much as I wanted to bluntly tell people you should not go to the same college as your boyfriend/girlfriend unless that is truly the first choice of your college. Do not call me a pessimist but relationships change from high school going into college. Emotions will happen that you had no idea that could be felt, the change in environment could also be a factor, and as philosophical as this is going to sound when you are in college you have a tendency to find yourself. College is probably one of the most important locations that people find out more about themselves than anywhere else because you finally have to do things that are in your benefit not in other peoples benefits. So what worked in high school may not always transfer over into your college life and before anyone begins to freak out, this is totally fine. If something does not fit in your life you are allowed to make the necessary changes to create a balance within your life.
Though on the other hand if you do maintain your long distance relationship with your high school sweetheart the one thing I would not do is suffocate them. Even being far away, entrapment can happen. Instead give them their space, message them frequently and pick a day or two out of the week to actually call or video chat with them. When I say talk to them I actually mean putting everything down, sitting down and giving your undivided attention. If you want to you can call them more to ask how they are doing but actually take a day out of your week to catch up with your partner, no one likes to be out of the loop! To listen to a familiar voice could ease the stress and could even encourage the relationship to continue. Remind each other that despite the miles of distance, the situations that will happen in life because life just loves to make any moment spontaneous when it can, that you are there for them to listen and regardless of what happens that you love them. (In my personal opinion even sending written letters are a lovely reminder. There is just something in seeing someone's handwriting in a letter that gives the effect that they are with you.) Conclusions could be drawn, but if you remind them of how much they mean to you the less they will worry you and the less you will worry. Physical touch is limited in a long distance relationship which may be the leading cause of why these relationships complicate themselves but it truly takes some strong partners who are loyal, honest, patient, and hopeful to make the relationship work. For any reason that you feel like you are doubting this relationship or your partner is drifting then that means there is some sort of lack of communication which should be fixed immediately. If you are upset just know that solving problems miles away will get difficult as each day passes so please take care of any issues, and if you have to swallow your pride, and apologize in the appropriate time frames.
College gives me mixed emotions and hopefully I am not the only one aha but just know that do not force anything if there are things that are supposed to happen they will or they may have already happened. Please do not doubt yourself this should be the time where we plunge into the deep end and experience many of the things we imagine to do when we were in high school or even when we were little kids. Stay hopeful, keep those minds open, and remember that there will always be someone out there to help you wherever you go! (Who may also be your next best friend!)
What is something that you look forward to in college?
xx Chaveltia
Monday, August 18, 2014
The Love Language
In my views of showing my affection, I do not really flaunt it instead it is quite silent. I am not the type that will profoundly shout from the top of my lungs who I love instead I write them handmade notes, letters, messages explaining how much I love them and how they impacted my life for the better. I just never thought a relationship with someone should be put on blast as long as you are able to tell them or demonstrate the affection you have for them it should be enough. In that case, when I do find myself loving someone they probably would not even notice since I sense that silent love is not that common at least where I live. Perhaps it is a timid trait that I have in which I have not grown out of or may never will.
My Dad was reading The 5 Love Language (which for those who are about to tell me I know I am not married but in the future I would want to read it) and he told me that there was five different languages to profess love to one another. You can show love using your words, serving others, receiving gifts, spending quality time, or through a physical touch. It makes sense now, love is more than just an emotion to describe affection for something, some place or someone but more of how one may define it. I would have to say my love language would be physical touch and I know that I feel weird being given hugs but it is just that warmth and security that comforts me. Each person has their own love language which is pretty intriguing because I never saw love that way before.
Love is pretty tricky though, it takes patience, compatibility, communication, and time. Knock on wood, but I have only been affected through one divorce in my life time (and no it wasn't my parents, they're still happily married). It saddens to see that a marriage could end so sudden and it worries me how sudden things can change between a relationship. Though for certain I know, they probably did not know each other well enough if they are already starting to have doubts as to where they stand in their relationship. Doubt and jealousy is a mixture that you do not want to see together. Doubt has a way of manipulating the mind causing it to jump into possible nonexistent conclusions ruining a good relationship. To avoid doubt, I guess it is to be faithful and honest with one another. Tell the truth even if it will hurt but please do not make your partner overthink especially when there is nothing to think of. That is one thing that destroys someone from the inside out and affects the people around them.
Revenge should not be a choice or an answer for closure. Be the smarter person and leave them. If they do not know how to treat a person well, what makes you think they will change? Never, no matter how many times they tell you sorry or tell you take me back, go back to the person that once abused you physically or and mentally. They are the ones who are mentally ill and needs help with whatever it is that they are currently going through. Sadly, people change even the ones you may have thought you had known backwards and forwards. Find the courage you need to overcome them and close that chapter as soon as you can. It still gives me shivers that some people will still go back after being mistreated, I am most certain that someone better will treat you righteously the way you deserve.
What is the love language you prefer?
xx Chavelita
My Dad was reading The 5 Love Language (which for those who are about to tell me I know I am not married but in the future I would want to read it) and he told me that there was five different languages to profess love to one another. You can show love using your words, serving others, receiving gifts, spending quality time, or through a physical touch. It makes sense now, love is more than just an emotion to describe affection for something, some place or someone but more of how one may define it. I would have to say my love language would be physical touch and I know that I feel weird being given hugs but it is just that warmth and security that comforts me. Each person has their own love language which is pretty intriguing because I never saw love that way before.
Love is pretty tricky though, it takes patience, compatibility, communication, and time. Knock on wood, but I have only been affected through one divorce in my life time (and no it wasn't my parents, they're still happily married). It saddens to see that a marriage could end so sudden and it worries me how sudden things can change between a relationship. Though for certain I know, they probably did not know each other well enough if they are already starting to have doubts as to where they stand in their relationship. Doubt and jealousy is a mixture that you do not want to see together. Doubt has a way of manipulating the mind causing it to jump into possible nonexistent conclusions ruining a good relationship. To avoid doubt, I guess it is to be faithful and honest with one another. Tell the truth even if it will hurt but please do not make your partner overthink especially when there is nothing to think of. That is one thing that destroys someone from the inside out and affects the people around them.
Revenge should not be a choice or an answer for closure. Be the smarter person and leave them. If they do not know how to treat a person well, what makes you think they will change? Never, no matter how many times they tell you sorry or tell you take me back, go back to the person that once abused you physically or and mentally. They are the ones who are mentally ill and needs help with whatever it is that they are currently going through. Sadly, people change even the ones you may have thought you had known backwards and forwards. Find the courage you need to overcome them and close that chapter as soon as you can. It still gives me shivers that some people will still go back after being mistreated, I am most certain that someone better will treat you righteously the way you deserve.
What is the love language you prefer?
xx Chavelita
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