Wings should be spread, not tucked

"Where will you be going to college?"
"What will you be majoring in?"
"Are you going to miss anyone when you leave for college?"
"How do you feel?"

In a nutshell, college has been the corn of the crop in many of my conversations I have encountered with other people which to me I do not mind since I already have a set plan but it does give me a reality check of what I will be leaving behind and what there is to expect as I spread these wings of mine. I have come to notice that the comfortable life at home will no longer be filled with my mother's cooking after a long day of school or of my father's jokes when he gets home from work or not being able to see my brothers or to split paths with my best friend, this is going to be difficult for me.  I know, I know that this transition will be hard but there is one thing that I am absolutely certain of is that if I do not leave for college now in this following autumn, and actually leave my house, pack up my things and leave this comfortable bubble town I will not have the urge to leave after. I am afraid of leaving do not get me wrong, but as scared as I am, I want to be able to experience this life everyone complains about. To have the chance to inhale this new breath of life first handed without having someone telling me where to go or what to do. To commit my own mistakes and find solutions for them. The sensation to feel human and carry out my own name instead being known as the little sister.

Another thing I want to touch upon is relationships not that I am in any at the moment, but I want to let you know that going to college is your moment and no one else's. As much as I wanted to bluntly tell people you should not go to the same college as your boyfriend/girlfriend unless that is truly the first choice of your college. Do not call me a pessimist but relationships change from high school going into college. Emotions will happen that you had no idea that could be felt, the change in environment could also be a factor, and as philosophical as this is going to sound when you are in college you have a tendency to find yourself. College is probably one of the most important locations that people find out more about themselves than anywhere else because you finally have to do things that are in your benefit not in other peoples benefits. So what worked in high school may not always transfer over into your college life and before anyone begins to freak out, this is totally fine. If something does not fit in your life you are allowed to make the necessary changes to create a balance within your life.

Though on the other hand if you do maintain your long distance relationship with your high school sweetheart the one thing I would not do is suffocate them. Even being far away, entrapment can happen. Instead give them their space, message them frequently and pick a day or two out of the week to actually call or video chat with them. When I say talk to them I actually mean putting everything down, sitting down and giving your undivided attention. If you want to you can call them more to ask how they are doing but actually take a day out of your week to catch up with your partner, no one likes to be out of the loop! To listen to a familiar voice could ease the stress and could even encourage the relationship to continue. Remind each other that despite the miles of distance, the situations that will happen in life because life just loves to make any moment spontaneous when it can, that you are there for them to listen and regardless of what happens that you love them. (In my personal opinion even sending written letters are a lovely reminder. There is just something in seeing someone's handwriting in a letter that gives the effect that they are with you.) Conclusions could be drawn, but if you remind them of how much they mean to you the less they will worry you and the less you will worry. Physical touch is limited in a long distance relationship which may be the leading cause of why these relationships complicate themselves but it truly takes some strong partners who are loyal, honest, patient, and hopeful to make the relationship work. For any reason that you feel like you are doubting this relationship or your partner is drifting then that means there is some sort of lack of communication which should be fixed immediately. If you are upset just know that solving problems miles away will get difficult as each day passes so please take care of any issues, and if you have to swallow your pride, and apologize in the appropriate time frames.

College gives me mixed emotions and hopefully I am not the only one aha but just know that do not force anything if there are things that are supposed to happen they will or they may have already happened. Please do not doubt yourself this should be the time where we plunge into the deep end and experience many of the things we imagine to do when we were in high school or even when we were little kids. Stay hopeful, keep those minds open, and remember that there will always be someone out there to help you wherever you go! (Who may also be your next best friend!)

What is something that you look forward to in college?

xx Chaveltia

You're so short

The first week of school I may have mentioned before that I was bullied for my height (something I have absolutely no control over) and instead of just keeping it to themselves they decide to compare heights with me like if I did not notice what they were doing. I want to address that my small size is only the outer part that I cannot hide about myself, and what people do is automatically create assumptions that because I am short they have every right to treat me like a child. Excuse me while I go grab a stool to slap sense into those people. I did not choose to be short as I told my best friend, neither did I choose to be a target. I already have to live with the fact that my doctor said that I am done with growing, that going shoe shopping becomes a chore because I have the smallest feet you can imagine and the tiniest wrists that every bracelet I wear slips right off which is why I do not wear or buy any.

Just because I have to look up most of the time to see people in the eye, it does not mean that I am looking up to you while in fact I only look up because I prefer to see a face than a crotch (and it is more respectable to give someone eye contact when you are speaking with them). Let just say that I am considerate to see faces or if not I would just look at the floor or the person's stomach. Something that agitates me the most is that people who I have no history with begin to speak in this idiotic ignorant tone of voice. I should just speak the same way back and instead throw sarcastic comebacks until they realize that I am not "10" because I am tired of those who correlates age with height. I do not correlate attitude with age, so do not correlate my age with my height. Many underestimate the power of what a short person can handle, not all of us who are short need help. If I cannot reach something in my house I will find a way to climb to my destination before I ask someone for help. I have climbed multiple countertops, pantries and closets you can say that I am pretty certified to handle the unreachable. 

As to this day I still have people ask me bluntly without even knowing my first name, "Why are you so short?" and sometimes I want to say "have you learned anything in Biology or were you too busy having your head up somewhere that doesn't shine?" Of course I am the implosive type of person so I would not say something like that out loud, but why do people ask such obvious questions is beyond ridiculous. I will teach you if you want. Everyone has genes in definition are molecular unit of hereditary of a living organism. Think of them as the instructions in the creation of a human. When a male and a female reproduce to have their children genes from both parents are mixed together to produce the new traits of the child. (Punnet squares are very lovely to paint the picture of the possibilities of their child and what traits they are likely to gain). I like to see myself as Gregor Mendel's pea plant experiment as the shortest pea plant that grew out of the other three plants. Family history plays a huge role of how I inherited my short height because my Dad's mother did not even reach 5 feet just like me though his father was a tall man. My Mom on the other hand her mother was about average height as so her father but being short did run in her family too. It just so happens that I was short because all of these factors affecting my genes. Now you know that before you ask obvious questions, maybe you should open up a Biology book and educate yourself on the human body. 

Height is nothing that should define you of the person you are. There will be ignorant people I have learned that will just want to upset you and just remember that they are not worth your time. Give them a sarcastic comment that either leaves them confuse or staring back at you with disgust. Either way they will stop to bother you. Do not let people take advantage of those sensitive emotions you have. One of the funny comebacks I like to say is, "I am glad you have a good pair of eyes to notice the obvious, congratulations!" 

Hopefully I have taught some of you something. Do not to be that person who states the obvious please I might as well walk around with a piece of paper in front of me with "STOP. THINK. SPEAK." 

How do you tolerate ignorant people?

xx Chavelita