"I don't know what to do"

Every time I hear someone tell me, "I don't know what to do", I break a little inside. If you do not know what you want, then how exactly am I supposed to know what you want? The only thing I could simply do is be your supporting friend and listen to anything that you have on your mind. This seems like a test and frankly I am not sure I am passing it. When I do not say anything the majority of the time is because I do not know what to say. It's like my mind goes on overdrive running infinite amount of circles as a hamster on a wheel. Though I have been thinking, if you do not know what to do I suggest you step back from the big picture. Perhaps you are over analyzing the choices you have that you are not quite seeing them clearly. Sometimes for a question it would only need a simple answer. Stress could indeed be a major factor and there are times you would want to breakdown. There is nothing wrong with breaking down it relieves some of the stress and it allows you to start over.

Some questions I ask myself when I feel this way is, "Why am I feeling like this?" which helps guide my focal point to the issue. Writing down these feelings in private could also shape the cluttered thoughts like for myself I have a journal where I write anything and everything when I could no longer handle it. It is your journal thus you can write anything in it, exactly the way you want it. What I advise you though is that you go and tell someone too. Talking about it with someone gives you leverage and to further organize those thoughts. Usually when someone does not know what to do, they have an idea what they want. They are not completely in the dark or how else would they know how they are feeling this way? This expression is rather tricky and from experience you just have to give it time. Do not ask me how much time you should give yourself or the person experiencing this because it all depends on the individual. I know it may sound a bit rude, but it's the best that I got. I cannot simply go into someone's mind and make decisions for them. I mean I could barely even make own decisions... Though what you can do is let them know that they are not alone in this. Do not force them into making a decision, this is the time where you have to be understanding and have patience for that person. Trust me, I know it is hard to see someone go through this though you still have your life is still continuing. You cannot just push pause on your own life. Do not drop everything for that person, when they are ready they will come for you. Faith is a key factor of dealing with circumstances like this. It is all about playing your cards right on your faith and facing whatever may come up.

What I also think is that perhaps yourself or that person needs to change something in their life in order to find their place. A routine could be great until there is one piece of it missing that throws you off. Think of what will make you content with your life and play with it. If something does not work, exchange it for something else until you find that happy medium. That is the wonderful thing about being your own person, that you are able to change what you do not like for something that you do. Just be careful for what you are changing because sometimes there is no way of going back to the life you previously had.

When was the last time you took a risk?

xx Chavelita

PS I apologize for not writing, I was indeed sorting out my own thoughts ahahaha but they will be more I actually have a list of topics on my phone so keep your eyes peeled for them! :)

Unexpected turns

The majority of this day I have been trying to gather my thoughts as to what would actually happen if something or someone from your life were to change and causing this sort of domino effect to the rest of your life. Events happen out of your control and you are forced to juggle around your emotions, the emotions of others who may be affected and still try to maintain sanity within yourself. Perhaps I am being selfish for mostly thinking about what would happen to me if the causes were to become reality rather than worrying for the causes on other people's life.

Side note: Everyone has problems because someone may have worse problems than you that should not mean that you should keep it to yourself. Problems big or small are problems and should be taken care of immediately before they develop into worse scenarios. Your problems are just as important as anybody else's, I just wish people would stop competing to see who has the worst the problem instead help each other out to find the solution to that problem.

I will not lie though, I am known to be the biggest worrier there is not one day where I am not worrying about something. I've been told multiple times that I should stop worrying over the little things because I always seem to find a way through the obstacles but if I don't worry then how else will I acknowledge that there is a problem or a potentiality that a problem will be created? What people do not understand is that I worry because I care and maybe I care a bit too much about things that do not even involve me but that is the person I am. I can be stubborn, clingy, and will do anything to bring back peace or the happiness of those who have impacted my life. Which I also find myself holding in a lot of information. It sounds a bit complicated, huh? That I may not be involved in the issue but people tell me their issue and it is as if I have been enrolled into the issue as the bystander or the advice giver? I do not mind that people come to me when they have problems because I honestly prefer they do. It is not because it adds power to my name but it means that people are entrusting themselves to receive help and although I may not always have the brilliant advice to give or the witty responses to cheer up a bad day, I will like them to know that I am there for them. Whether we stopped talking for a number of days, have not seen each other in a few weeks, I will still be here because I know how it feels like to be left in the dust when the only person who will hear you is a bear made out of fluff.

I apologize that this advice post is not the regular peppy inspirational post you would normally read on here, but today has just been one of those "emotional roller coasters, insert your earphones and exclude yourself from others" kind of day and hopefully everything gets sorted out soon. I hope you have a wonderful day.
How do you deal with the unexpected turns in your life?

xx Chavelita

Recalculating

There are just moments in life where you seem that you have everything together, you find yourself content with the life you've decided to take, and you sense that nothing can go wrong. As swift and easy, negativity comes rushing through you like the plague and steals away all the confidence that took you so long to build up. Now let me tell you that is probably one of the worst feelings to experience because it's not a outside source that is causing the problem (though it could be a factor) but you also play the role as the predator of your own thoughts with what you see. Interpretation and perspective can be deadly when they're put together. There is no avoiding it, there will be people, posts, books, music, pretty much anything that can inspire and or dissuade you from the person you want to become. Sometimes it is not even your fault because I believe that people change for their own benefit and depending on what it is (though that may not always be the case), that is up to you to decide to keep that person in your life or continue without them. Let me ask you, do you love yourself? Do you love the life you molded yourself into? If you answered yes for both questions then there is nothing wrong with you and if you want to enrich your life I think you should do it. Do not forget about the people who helped you get to where you are and the experiences you have gone through because they are the reason for the path you've chosen. If you answered no for one or both questions, what is it that you want in life? What are some things you can fix that can get you back onto the right path? Do not be afraid to ask for help, but also be careful who you ask for help. The changes you make does not always have to be anything major because even the little changes make a large impact. I will not lie, it's confusing because I do not have an exact answer to give you to overcome this because everyone has different methods of coping but if you're starting to become unhappy then maybe you're going the wrong way. Retract your steps if you have to and hopefully it will newly enlighten the light inside of you. Remember just like Jessie J said, "It's okay not to be okay" but it's not okay to sit there and do nothing about it either.

xx Chavelita