Day 27: Bad Day pass

For the longest time I would have considered myself as the Debby Downer out of my group of friends. Not because I saw more the negative side of things and would dwell on them more (which come to think of it, that could of been a factor, the dwelling part not the seeing everything as negative part) but I think because I have been such an optimistic growing up that I feel like a bit of the overlooked negativity caught up with me. I would try my best to avoid the bad days that I would repress my problems and would attempt to find a way to not let the bad days happen. Like that could happen. That worked until they became too much to handle that led to just more stress and trouble in my direction. I began to realize that not everything is as rosy and pretty and being positive all of the time is exhausting! I did not understand the difference between what a pessimistic would view the world and what a bad day entitled. This was me for the majority of my adolescences, I just did not like having to deal with my problems and the stress that came with it and to not tell anyone seemed like such a great answer! I cringe at the way I would treat myself in the past, always trying to put on a brave face to make sure I was the least of someone's worries. And you know what? Everyone is worth worrying about. Not too much worry that it brings in stress and anxiety but enough to know that you care about their well-being. I did not realize at the time, but the more you keep quiet the more suspicion is brought on you, and no matter if you win the award for best hidden emotions, people are still going to worry about you.

Everyone is entitled to having their bad days. Some people like to show that they are having a bad day through social media or other forms of communication and other people like to have their bad days in private or with a close friend. Even the most positive people you may encounter have their bad days and they deal with their bad days. The more you get older, I believe, and you still find a way to remain a positive outlook on life and world, should be handed an award. Problems get more complicated when you have to start making your own decisions and life can sometimes be an emotional roller coaster. Yes and even adults have to take a moment for themselves to settle into the situations that are thrown at them. Overall, I want to say that I am not an optimistic but I also do not like to dwell in negative aspects of life so I find better methods to handle with the not so pretty parts of life. I started using my words and stated the things that I did not like or that have been bothering me. You come to understand that there are just days where if in order to get over something and feel better is if you need to cry it out or throw out some swear words, then be my guest.

Everyone has different ways of dealing with stress, some habits better than others, but I just hope that you are finding a healthy outlet to let go of some of that stress that is preventing you from being happy. Just like everyone is entitled to have bad days, everyone is also entitled to being happy. I wish there was such thing as a Bad Day pass at work or at school and with that being said you were excused. Like instead of a Sick Day pass when you got the flu, you have a Bad Day pass because it is important to also take care of your mental health. Just because you cannot detect immediately whether someone is emotionally well or not, it does mean that the potential of someone being in distress does not exist. So do not feel bad or non-deserving for the days that you happen to feel sad, I rather you acknowledge your problems for what they are than to stay quiet with your thoughts and coming up with conclusions that do not pair up with your problem. Just make sure you are not revisiting the same problem, one visit should be plenty.

My mama instincts are showing, but just know that I care for your well-being. You can still be strong and have bad days. Those bad days strengthen you not weaken you.

Do you wish Bad Day Passes existed?

xx Chavelita

Discouragement is the devil

Raise your hand if you ever encountered the sensation of losing faith in what you believe in? Or to have this feeling that no matter how hard or how much you work to strive for success you still feel stuck? Well I'm going to be straightforward with you all, it's the worst. We try to pick up our loose pieces but we drop them as soon as we see someone else finding the success you were grasping for. Well the only way to get through discouragement is to actually tackle down the problem. I have my waves but the way I manage to get through them is to remind myself of the accomplishments that were completed. If I were to get through those, what makes the the next problem any different? At the moment it may seem like you're climbing up a snowy mountain, never ending and tiresome, clueless as to where you will end up to be. The atmosphere so thick that you cannot see in front or in back of you but you keep pushing forward because we have this mentality that we've made it this far that to give up seems like a waste of effort. 

To friends I've been telling them to believe in themselves. Yes it is easier said than done, but it is a crucial step to take. A friendly reminder from yourself to yourself. Practice it. Preach it. Sing it. Scream it. Do whatever it takes to get that message engraved into your head. Do not throw in the towel just yet if you feel like something is not working out change it up a bit. Pick your battles carefully and plan them out. Do not just plan one out but a good set of three just in case you change your mind or something does not work out that you have a back up plan to soften your fall. 

Be optimistic. Apply your talents whenever you can, try not to take your failures too personally. I cannot promise you that everything will work out because that would be a lie but I can promise you that the sooner you get up the better. Keep the ball rolling and do not compare yourself to others successes because your successes are incomparable to others. Only you know what those successes are worth. Do not let other things or people dull you or of your achievements. If people congratulate you for them bless their hearts but don't let that distract you either. Just like the book Me Before You, “You only get one life. It’s actually your duty to live it as fully as possible.” (You should read this novel when you have the chance). So yes, live your life and avoid getting stuck. If you do, find a way to get back on your feet. Time is not stopping for anybody so use it to your full advantage. 

PS The new year is coming up perhaps take this time to clean up your plan and tweak it if needed. Change can be refreshing but be careful as well. Maintain a balance within yourself and others. Do not completely isolate yourself from distractions or people but do not get attached to anyone either. 

What are your plans to live life to the fullest? 

xx Chavelita